Hello! I wrote about some tunes today. Would you like to read what I wrote? Of course you would. You are nice. Your name is Mr Nice, and you live in Niceton with three nice cats and a nice budgie, and a mentally retarded son whom you keep gagged and chained in the basement with the rotting corpse of your murdered wife.

HEYYYYYYY, gang!

Guess what?

Audiosurf.

Hello dears! One week ago, I went to Fami-mode, an all-night 8bit music party in Tokyo, featuring YMCK, Sexy Synthesizer, and other bands of a like nature. Did you go too? No? Well read my wonderful article and be transported there, with the magic of words! Whee-hee-hee!

Hello, I wrote another article about videogame-related music, you know how I do. This one is all about chiptunes, mostly. Read it now with your eyes and brain!

WARNING: THIS TEXT IS LARGE

It's another one of these! I wrote it very early this morning, in a Korean PC bang. I flew to Korea at my own expense, just to write this column!

Don't thank me -- thank my good pal, Fatty Hamster.

Hi there. Would you like to enjoy music, but you don't know how? Don't worry -- Patrick can help. He is an expert in things and is willing to share his secrets with you. Did you know that he has a rudimentary nostril on his lower back? And that's just one example. Don't miss this amazing opportunity! Click the link below, before you die full of regret.

HEY YOU! Do you like... MUSIC?

If you answered, "Yes, except for blue-eyed American a capella singers doing pissweak versions of Christmas carols with smug grins on their stupid faces," then THIS IS AN ARTICLE FOR YOU.

(It's about videogame music arrangements.)