Everyone knows that press releases are created by pushing a microphone into a company executive's arsehole and taking dictation. We've gotten used to it and it's no big deal. OR IS IT??

Patrick -- who feels anger at things, and can be embarrassing to be around -- thinks it is. Humour this harmless madman by agreeing to read his meticulous deconstruction of a Sony press release, then feel shock and fear as you realise you cannot deny the truth of his words! Despair that you were not prepared for his world-shattering revelations, and wish, vainly, that you could somehow un-read them!

(Go on, it's pretty funny.)