Babblefish

It's said that language separates us from animals. In my experience it is more often cages, fences or strong glass. Also, I suppose I am constantly separated from many animals by oceans or great distances, and on one occasion I was separated from an angry Great Dane by a pair of policemen. (The dog had purloined my German wurst and I was attempting to retrieve it.)

The Magnificent All-Seeing Eye Upon deviantART

You know that bit in The Neverending Story with the statues that can see into your soul? And you have to pass by them without any fear in your heart, because if they sense even the slightest bit of fear, for even a moment, they will open their eyes and burn you with laser beams?

Yeah, that bit was cool.

A Trouserful of Melody

It's said that music soothes even the savage beast. I'm not inclined to believe it, because I'm noticing a pattern of people saying things about animals, with nothing to back them up. I mean have any of these people, for example, locked themselves in a room with a grizzly bear and a stereo, and just tasered that grizzly bear right in the testicles? I'm willing to bet they haven't; in fact, I'm going to look it up right now.

Video

It's said that video killed the radio star. Well, video did no such thing. It turns out the radio star was killed when he locked himself in a room with a grizzly bear and a stereo, and just went ahead and punched that grizzly bear right in the dick.