(The following is a rewrite of an article originally posted by raezr in the forums. If you want to read the original version, or thank raezr for his excellent work, click here.)
GameDaily is one of those dime-a-dozen gaming sites that I've always just ignored. But for whatever reason – boredom, masochism – I was browsing it today and discovered (much to my surprise) that senior editor Chris Buffa is actually the world’s foremost critic of sloppy games journalism. For almost three years, Chris has been busily penning scathing editorials such as:
Why Videogame Journalism Sucks
How to Fix Videogame Journalism
How to Become a Better Videogame Journalist
Clearly, this is a man on a mission. While other games journalists have been wanking themselves silly over the latest Halo game or whatever, Chris has been in the trenches, producing the very articles that will one day restore integrity and honour to the games press. Let’s take a look at some now.
The first one to really catch my eye is about CGI elf girls. You see, unlike the snivelling toadies at Gamespot or IGN, Chris Buffa isn’t about to let the man stop him from telling us the facts, especially when the facts are about hot elven bitches. I don’t know about you, but until I read Chris’ feature, I had no idea that the protagonist from Kameo was so totally bangable. Those other game journalists certainly weren’t saying anything about it.
But it isn’t just slutty computer elves that command Chris’ journalistic interest. It turns out he's fond of real girls too. In "Babes Playing Games", our fearless reporter examines a number of videogame ads featuring women, and explains in lurid detail what he finds attractive about each. Does it bother him that most of the women in question aren’t even trying to look sexy? No sir! As a connoisseur of the female form, Chris has no trouble unearthing the buried hotness in each photograph. Indeed, even age is no barrier to his keen sexual senses.
Fortunately, it seems Buffa’s enthusiasm for producing intelligent games journalism has infected the entire GameDaily staff. Here are just a few of our favourite works:
Hairiest Chests in Gaming
Top 25 Ways to Die in 2008
Top 10 Buffest Videogame Dudes
Weirdest Hairstyles in Gaming
And last but definitely not least, Babes We'll Wait For – another Buffa masterpiece in which he lists his favourite “not-quite-legal cuties in videogames”. Like this one, for example:
Truly, ladies and gentlemen, this is the future of games journalism.
This is a bit of an administrative update, just to let you know that
a) The Eegra Sexy Sexbombs Sex Database has been updated. Thanks to the mad tech-support skillz of Coroner over at PHP Unlimited (who built the gallery software we're using), it's no longer such a hassle to submit a SEXXXY photograph – all you gotta do is follow five easy steps. So now you have no excuse not to contribute. Other than wanting to maintain your dignity, I mean.
b) In yesterday's article on Chris Buffa and GameDaily, I forgot to mention that raezr – who authored the original forum post the article was based on – has his own videogame blog. Click here to read it. (Go on! It's good!)
And that's everything. Now I'm off to watch television in my underwear.
P.S. Thank you to everyone who emailed me about pre-populating a blank form in vBulletin. As it turns out, you were all wrong, but I appreciate the effort nonetheless!